COLUMN: Spring is here

The spring season is a time of beautiful flower blossoms, chirping birds, school proms and beautiful sun.  We are not alone taking advantage of those warming rays of sunshine to garden, frolic or lie in the new growth of freshly cut grass.  There are others wanting to share it also.

Meet New York’s most common of snake species, the Garter Snake.  It is often erroneously referred to as a grass or gardener snake and frequently found in lawns, fields and woodland edges.  While adult male and female garter snakes look alike, females are typically longer and bulkier.  Mature males average about 16 to 24 inches in length, while females can reach about 30 to 36 inches long.  And like the female pictured here, not all common garter snakes have the typical three stripes often observed on ones in your yard, depicted in book/magazine photos or found on the internet.  It is most active in the morning and late afternoon but in cooler part of the season, it restricts its activity to the warm afternoons.

Garters consume many kinds of insects, slugs, worms and occasional small frog or mouse. I caught this gal with a worm half way in its mouth but was too late retrieving my camera to record it. Although these innocuous snakes are not considered poisonous, recent research and studies show they do have a mild venom in their saliva which contains a very mild neurotoxin. Rather than injecting it through fangs, they spread it into wounds caused by their two fangs through a chewing motion to stun a toad or small rodent enough to make swallowing it much easier.

Even though the venom of a garter snake is only potent enough to cause some minor swelling, burning or itching in a human, a word to the wise; it should be treated by a medical professional to prevent possible infection it does often carry from consumption of other species. These snakes are only known to bite humans while defending themselves against being killed or captured barehanded.

As far as discouraging these slithering serpents from your yard, don’t go rushing off to the local reptile exterminator for a chemical solution to your Herpetophobia. Snake repellents sold commercially have not been found to be very successful at all in deterring snakes. There are, however, according to the Internet, countless ways to get rid of a snake problem. Personally, some of them seem expensive , unhealthy or more trouble than what it is worth. As follows:

1. For those whom obviously don’t mow their own lawn – “use sisal rope. Put it where you don’t want the snake. Because of the soft underbelly of the snake, it will not cross over the rope.”

2. For those whom just love snorting some medicinal aroma all summer and don’t care about their health or getting sued by a neighbor for their child thinking it was a sugar ball – “put moth balls down in early spring and no more snakes the rest of the summer.”

3. For those who believe in magic – “mulch your garden or landscape with cedar chips, it will repel snakes.”

4. For those with an unlimited supply of cash to border your entire yard – “buy sticky rodent pads from the hardware store, put them together end to end, they work great.”

5. For those with a sense of humor – “Wasp spray works great. Get the kind that shoots 40 feet, chase them all over the yard until they roll up in a ball and then soak them down good. B###ds”

6. For those of you like me, you can really, really relate to this one – “Know your neighborhood.”

7. For those of you protecting your interpretation of the second amendment rights – “Blast’em with a 12 gauge. Even if you miss they will never return.”

Seriously folks, all you really have to do is own a couple of outdoor cats. I will forewarn you though about female Calico cats, having had one for nearly 20 years until she passed recently. For one, they are not a lap cat and two they have no prejudices about what they haul to your doorstep. Ours brought back everything imaginable that slithered, flew or walked except a horse.  She couldn’t quite get it up over steep bank out back.

Lazy furball!